Edward Doesn’t Stand A Chance

The first trailer for Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter was released today.  Here it is in all its axe-swinging, train-jumping, Presidential glory:

This trailer, in terms of pure excitement level, bests The Hobbit and The Dark Knight Rises simply because it’s something we haven’t seen before.  Although I can’t wait to revisit the Middle Earth Munchkins and the Caped Crusader, I am curiously anticipatory of what Timur Bekmambatov and Tim Burton can do with a $69 million budget – a little more than a quarter of the budgets for the aforementioned films (but Peter Jackson made The Fellowship of the Ring with “only” $93 million).  I found Bekmambatov’s prior film, Wanted, to be lacking for a story that made me care at all about any of the characters, but then again, none of them were Abraham Lincoln.  I also have never read the book that Vampire Hunter is based on – but faithful adaptation or no, adding vampires to the Civil War seems like a good idea.  I can only hope that the film doesn’t attempt some sort of heavy-handed commentary on slavery, and chooses to focus on Honest Abe’s axe-swinging, undead-splattering killfests.

My favorite moments from the trailer:

  1. The burning-train-leap (although I hope this vampire-related train is better than the one in Priest).
  2. The not-so-subtle stake imagery of the Washington Monument shot at sunset.
  3. Not a single clear shot of a vampire – just lots of leaping and yelling and exploding.
  4. Young Abe literally making a tree explode with his axe in the final shot.

Sometimes I like my vampires dark and subtle (Let the Right One In, Interview with a Vampire, Dracula) and sometimes I like them bitey and animalistic (From Dusk Till Dawn, I am Legend), but I never like them sparkly.  Go get ’em, Abe.